By Lurenda Suplido-Westergaard, M.D., Contributor
INQUIRER.net
15. TAKING a taxi out of the supermarket — First of all, taking a taxi is very expensive (more about public transport later), but what I really miss is having an attendant actually carry the stuff out, wait with you as you enter the taxi line, and load up the goods. That kind of service doesn’t exist here. Heck, they don’t even give you free shopping bags at the supermarket: You have to bring your own, or they charge you for each one you take.
14. Being able to drive — First, no license. Second, can’t afford to buy a car (at 200-percent tax, never mind). Third, I easily get lost (one open field looks just like any other). Fourth, I can’t imagine myself filling up at a gas station (me holding the gas nozzle? Ewwww!). Fifth, I wouldn’t know what to do if there’s a solid sheet of ice on the windshield.
13. Taking two minutes to dress up Alex in sando (undershirt), shorts, and sandals — Here: underpants, long socks, normal socks, long pants, t-shirt, long sleeved shirt, sweater, gloves, winter coveralls, boots, hood. Minimum: 30 minutes. If he’s not cooperative, this takes an hour. Pagod na ako, hindi pa kami nakakalabas ng pinto (We’ve not gone out the door and already I’m tired)!
12. Being able to blend in — Almost the entire indigenous population is blonde, and I get a sense that all women are at least 5′8″. People don’t stare (as we do at foreigners in Pinas, out of a naive curiosity rather than rudeness), but it is not possible to just pass through here unnoticed. This is especially uncomfortable for someone with a self-conscious streak. Of course there are deeper issues here: It’s about being in the minority. The last place where I lived abroad for an extended period was
11. Long mall hours — Everything is closed by 6 or 7 p.m. on weekdays, by 3 p.m. on Saturdays. And there’s nothing open on Sundays (except on eight Sundays of the year)! What happened to shopping after work? Or sitting in coffee shops till midnight? I’m told it’s because family life (being at home) is so central to living that commercial establishments have to let their employees go and enjoy it.
10. People with a more friendly sense of personal space — Having grown up riding jeepneys (and buses on pre-MRT EDSA), I think nothing of being packed like a sardine in public transport, thighs squished together on both sides. One time I sat beside an old man on a public bus, I swear he gave me an elbow (okay, he might have had Parkinson’s). But there was another time when I reached over to press the stop button and the lady beside me raised her arms in a defensive move, like preparing for a karate chop (okay, maybe she was physically abused in the past). In a half-full bus, I see people electing to stay standing. Those who sit together in the two-seater row are friends, not strangers.
9. Minimum fare of P7.50 — Here it’s P96.00 (that’s on buses/trains where you can have unlimited transfers within two adjacent geographical areas over one hour; but you still pay the same minimum fare even if you’re just going for a five-minute ride).
8. Temperatures above 20 degrees — This is a country where the average annual temperature is seven degrees Celsius. Haaaay! Apat na patong ng damit, nanunuot pa rin ang lamig. Bawiin ang Nobel Peace Prize ni Al Gore (Four layers of clothes and the cold still seeps in. Get back Al Gore’s Nobel Peace Prize)!
7. Policemen — Never thought I’d say this, but I miss seeing policemen, armed security guards, traffic enforcers, and the “friskers” at the entrances of malls and LRT stations. Not that I long for their presence; it’s their absence that is disconcerting. In my one month’s stay here, I swear I’ve only seen one policeman (his partner, the driver of the police car, was female). At the police station where I had to report my presence, the staff were all women. There are lots of cameras on public transportation and highways, still, getting the personal touch is different (hahaha).
6. 12-percent VAT — That sounds good if you now have to pay 25 percent.
5. McDo, Pizza Hut, Don Henrico’s, Jollibee, Max’s, and all restaurants who deliver even if you’re just ordering food for one. Corollary to that is having hot meals three times a day (at least). — Here, it’s buttered bread and yoghurt for breakfast, cold cuts sandwich for lunch, and a hot meal for dinner. Ack! Walang ginataang bilu-bilo na meryenda sa umaga at walang pancit malabon na meryenda sa hapon (No Filipino snacks in the morning and afternoon)!
4. Going to the movies — This is a country with the most expensive movie theater tickets in the world, and the theaters are far from where I live (well not really far, but I would be spending more than minimum fare; add that to the cost of movie tickets.).
3. Filipinos — I’ve only seen one Pinoy (plus two on many previous visits) in the streets. This is not a preferred destination for overseas workers because taxes take out at least 40 percent of your income (closer to 60 percent total), and then there’s VAT. It’s great if you live here, retire here, and your entire family is supported by the social system (with free education and health care), but it’s near impossible to send money to relatives back home.
2. Filipino the language — The sound of Filipino is heavy on hard T’s, K’s, D’s, and short A’s; what you hear is what you spell (and the other way around). Here there are all kinds of rolling R’s and soft D’s; H’s and V’s that are barely there. Sabihin mo nga sa akin kung paanong naging “mal” ang pagbigkas ng “meget” (Just tell me how “mal” becomes “meget” when spoken)? I’m told that everyone understands English, but they won’t volunteer that. They will speak their language until you say that you can’t speak it yourself.
1. Daylight — Alas-tres pa lang madilim na (It’s just three o’clock in the afternoon and it’s already dark)! Now the days are at their shortest (supposedly seven hours, but it’s really not daylight, more like dusk all day). Losing light is like being hungry — I feel crabby, tired, and a bit sorry for myself. I never knew I subsisted on photosynthesis. There are gadgets for sale that simulate daylight. There’s a new alarm clock on the market that comes with a big wakeup light that’s supposed to be like the dawn. I think this is the hardest for me to get used to. It’s not about being afraid of the dark, it’s about not having the sun streaming through the windows when it should. Someone told me that when there is light, I should go out and soak up as much of it as I can. Pero kung balot na balot naman ako, eh di noo at pisngi lang ang pwedeng mag-sunbathing (But if I’m covered in clothes, it’s just my forehead and cheeks that get to sun-bathe)!

January 5th, 2008 at 1:49 pm
Thanks everyone for your comments! I appreciate your support, especially those who shared their own thoughts of what they miss in the Philippines, as well as those who offered support services in DK.
Yes, I am integrating quite well, and have just started language classes. My family here is very supportive.
Yes, I now know what to do with a frozen windshield. The point was that I had to learn, and not that I couldn’t
I got an application form for a driver’s license but will submit it after I learn the language.
No, I’m not an elitist. I’m not rich, and neither is my husband. I painted our apartment (Ewww!) because that’s something you do for yourself - you don’t pay others to do it for you.
Yes, there are many things to like here. There is a second part to this post: “Countdown to 15 things I wish I had sent home for Christmas”, which I hope the editors will post soon. There is always a good and bad side to everything. I hope you will all read that too.
MLSW
January 5th, 2008 at 1:00 pm
i can totally appreciate this. I love basketball and now in a country that doesn’t have it. And people tell me to adopt rugby, football, soccer etc.
i miss everything back home. I have travelled in other countries and is totally a big change for me for malls to close at 6pm.
I like that Phils and others have a 24 hr day.
mostly friends and families. Though you will develop new friendships, it’s still not the same.
for the US folks here, life hasn’t changed much for you except if you’re in alaska or some snow plowed state. I have been there and loved it. That’s why a lot of pinoys go there.
Other countries are really hard to adjust and some are easy.
It really is just a financial sacrifice. There are things I appreciate more about the Phils now compared to before.
January 5th, 2008 at 11:53 am
I read this article and I was smiling, because anyone who has lived all his/her life in the Philippines will be able to relate and laugh at the things that the good doctor mentioned in her blog. I was, however, not smiling at the comments by some people about her blog.
My comment? From all the comments I’ve read, I can tell which ones have lived in the Philippines and know the nuances of being a resident here, and I can tell which ones didn’t. I think the Tagalog lines that the writer put in were funny, charming and to the point. So, yeah, as one person wrote here, give the doctor a break.It’s her way of venting and as was often mentioned before, you never really appreciate something until it’s gone. In her case,she was able to appreciate the Philippines even more, and that’s a good thing. She’s learning to adjust to Denmark, too, and that’s an equally good thing too. The taxis, the long mall hours, the sunlight (or lack of it thereof), the taxes, the feeling of being a minority, the friendly space she misses and craves, these are all true and it’s her truth, and who are we to judge her and her truths and realizations? It’s not about going back her loving the Philippines more and she should just come back here, I don’t think that was her point. she certainly wasn’t being racist and she certainly as hell isn’t being a bad writer…I know of a lot of writers who can’t string a coherent plot line and yet are grossing millions from their ineptitude. I am going to London in a few months. I can’t tell you how freaked out I am by that. I’ve lived in the Philippines all my life, and I’ve been trying to process that. The things that used to annoy me, well, I’m appreciating them more now because I won’t be seeing them in a few years..Yeah, I sure am gonna miss the sun (glorious sun!), the temperature, the stressful traffic, the police (even though they freak me out sometimes), the mall hours, the lower taxes, the steady, constant stream of people flowing through the malls and the markets and the ever-present energy and vibrance only the Philippines can offer. I love the Philippines. I am not leaving because I wanna earn more, I am leaving to challenge myself more, in other areas of my life. I am sure that the doctor feels the same way. And she is dealing with the homesickness, the loss and isolation, admirably, with good humor. And that’s a good thing.
Writer Jessica Zafra once said, if you can look past your anger and laugh about it, you’re stronger than you think. I say, if you can look past your homesickness and loss and isolation and laugh about it, you are stronger than you think, too. Zafra says, Anyone can throw a tantrum, but it takes guts to process it and turn it into something funny. This is what separates Filipinos from others. This is what the doctor is doing. This is our secret and why even though we are a poor country, we are the happiest country in the world. That is the secret of life. ^_^
January 5th, 2008 at 10:56 am
17. Kwek-kwek
January 5th, 2008 at 10:51 am
16. Add to your list - Boy Bawang