Spoiler alert: Blogging WWE Night of Champions results

WATCHING World Wrestling Entertainment Night of Champions on Jack TV and the ac tion is about to start. Keep refreshing this page to get the latest results. And stop reading if you do n't want the results spoiled for you heh :) Jim Ross welcomes everyone as they broadcast Night of Champions from deep in th e heart of Texas, saying that the arena is sold out with a crowd of 16, 151 WWE fans. Fellow SmackDown (yes, JR is now with SmackDown) commentator Mick Foley greets JR and the viewers. First up is the WWE tag team championship match. WWE Tag Team champions The Miz and John Morrison make their way to the ring. Next up are the challengers, Finlay and his, uh, son, Hornswoggle (please don't ask). *** Foley says Finlay is able to inject the "classic European style" as opposed to the American style of catch wrestling. OK, whatever you say, Mick. I still don' t like Finlay, and the leprechaun, either. *** Haha, Finlay uses his "son" Hornswoggle as a battering ram against the tag team champs. OK, that was amusing. Will this be the night of the Irish? *** Nice teamwork by the champs, who are making frequent tags to keep Finlay at b ay. Oh jeez, Hornswoggle tags himself in, and -- WTF -- the leprechaun hits a Stunn er! Followed by a Bulldog. *** Hornswoggle is trying to crawl to their corner. Can Hornswoggle make the tag? Noooo!!! *** Hornswoggle finally manages to tag in Finlay, who goes to work. Celtic Cross by Finlay. Makes the tag to Hornswoggle, who is about to attempt a Tadpole Splash (yeah, a mini-Frog Splash) from the top rope, but Morrison re verses and then pins the leprechaun for the 1-2-3. The tag team champs win and retain their title! Winners: The Miz and John Morrison *** Heh, they show a replay of Hornswoggle doing the Stunner, and Foley says, "Some where in Texas, Stone Cold [Steve Austin] must be smiling." *** Michael Cole and Jerry "The King" Lawler greet the viewers, and reminds them ho w the recent draft has made an impact on Night of Champions. Triple H, who is d efending his WWE Championship against John Cena, has been drafted to SmackDown, so if he wins, his title will go with him to SmackDown. *** Next up is the US Championship. Chavo Guerrero makes his way to the ring, toget her with bodyguard and fellow La Familia member Bam Neely. Champ Matt Hardy the n makes his entrance. Match is underway. Will Chavo's bodyguard be a major factor in this match? *** Chavo is working on the injured left knee of Matt Hardy. Chavo is "systematically dissecting the left leg" of Hardy, JR comments. *** Matt hits the Side Effect. Matt covers Chavo, but he kicks out. *** Chavo tries to make Matt submit with a half Boston Crab, but Matt reaches the r opes. Matt hits the DDT and covers Chavo, who again kicks out. Chavo again tries the half Boston Crab, but again Matt is able to reach the rop es. *** Chavo looks like he is attempting the Three Amigos, but from out of nowhere, Ma tt hits the Twist of Fate to counter! Matt pins Chavo for the 1-2-3 to retain the US Championship. Winner: Matt Hardy *** Remember, all matches at Night of Champions is (duh!) a championship match. So far, it's 2-0 for the champs. Man, I can't even decide who to root for later in Triple H vs John Cena. I don' t like either of them. *** ECW commentators Taz and Mike Adamle welcome viewers, as the ECW Championship m atch is about to get underway. It's a Triple Threat Match involving champ Kane, The Big Show, and, ho hum, The World's Strongest Man, Mark Henry. Mark Henry makes his entrance. Next up is Big Show, who earned this championship shot by winning the Singapore Cane match in Judgment Day One Night Stand. Now the champ Kane makes his entrance. *** The action is underway. I'm rooting for Show. Anyway, Kane has been drafted to Raw, along with Batista, who will be challenging Edge later for the World Heavy weight Championship. *** Right now it's Show and Mark Henry in the ring, while Kane is outside, just wat ching them. Why do they insist on using Mark Henry? Can you say slow? Show scoops up Mark Henry and slams him, heh. *** After Show and Mark Henry beat each other up, Kane decides to enter the ring, c limbing the top rope and hits Henry. Haha, now it's a double Choke Slam as Kane and Show take out the trash, er, I m ean, Henry. *** Kane once again goes to the top rope and goes flying, but Show catches him and Choke Slams him! Show pins him, but Kane kicks out. *** WTF! All attention was on Kane and Show, with Kane doing a suplex on Show, when out of nowhere Mark Henry smashes his 450-pound frame into Kane and pins him! Mark Henry is the new ECW Champion. What the hell? Oh, well, Kane is going to Raw. Winner: Mark Henry *** Backstage interlude with Money in the Bank winner CM Punk telling John Cena and Batista that his briefcase is getting heavy. Will he cash it in at Night of Ch ampions? Maybe that's why Henry won haha to job for CM Punk later :) One can dream. *** Next up is the World Tag Team Championship. Defending champs Hardcore Holly and Cody Rhodes enter the ring. Next up is challenger Ted DiBiase Jr. Who's going to be his tag team partner? "Um, there's a problem. My partner texted me and says he's on his way," DiBiase says. He asks if they can wait for 10 minutes. *** In one of the crappiest twists ever heh turns out Cody Rhodes is DiBiase's myst ery partner. Rhodes ambushes his partner from behind when the match starts, and DiBiase reve als the treachery. DiBiase then quickly pins Holly, and now DiBiase and Rhodes are the new World Tag Team Champions. Winners: Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes *** Boring blah-blah-blah interlude with Todd Grisham at the luxury suite interview ing John Bradshaw Liefeld, who is complaining because he's not part of this pay -per-view. JBL asks Todd why he's not part of Night of Champions. "Because you're not a champion," Todd replies. LOL! *** Man, isn't this JBL crap over yet? Now he's dissing Mark Cuban, and then the Da llas Cowboys. *** Cheap heat as JBL tells the booing crowd his favorite city is New York, home of the SuperBowl champs, the New York Giants. Thankfully, this boring segment is over, and we're now going to find out who WW E Intercontinental Champion Chris Jericho's surprise opponent will be. *** Chris Jericho's original opponent was Shawn Michaels, but he's supposedly unabl e to compete because of an eye injury. Chris is now ranting about how he's competed even when he's injured. *** OK, talk about a surprise opponent. It's Kofi Kingston, the Jamaican Sensation, who's been drafted to Raw from ECW. *** The high-flying Kofi is pretty good, but there was no build up to this match, a nd I really can't get into it. After that crappy DiBiase angle, and the crapp ier JBL segment, this PPV is becoming really boring. *** In another shocker, turns out Shawn Michaels is in the arena, and his distracti on costs Chris Jericho the match. Kofi is the new champ! Winner: Kofi Kingston *** Now it's time for the WWE Women's Championship match. Defending champ Mickie James makes her entrance. Now the challenger Katie Lea Burchill enters the ring. *** Katie Lea seems to be the more powerful of the two women, Michael Cole notes. W ell, yeah, Mickie's known for her spunk and speed, not really her power, right? *** Mickie James hits the DDT and then pins Katie Lea to retain her title. Winner: Mickie James *** It's time for the World Heavyweight Championship match -- Edge vs Batista, baby ! *** Edge and Batista have made their way to the ring. Don't tell me Edge "banished" The Undertaker from WWE, only to have to job to B atista heh :) *** Uh-oh, JR and Mick Foley keep talking about Edge's unbeaten streak when it come s to defending the World Heavy Championship against Batista. Usually a bad si gn. Will the streak end with this match? *** So far, it seems like Edge is serious about wanting to beat Batista without any help from La Familia. Not a peep from La Famila, Mick Foley notes. *** Batista Spears Edge. People think it's over, but Edge gets his shoulder up. *** Batista goes for the Batista Bomb, but Edge counters with a DDT. Edge covers Ba tista, but it's not enough to put away Batista. *** La Familia finally makes an appearance. Batista has Edge covered, but just when it looks like he's won, SmackDown gener al manager Vickie Guerrero pulls away the ref. It's mayhem as Batista later grabs Vickie and sends her sailing throught the ai r when he throws her against the other members of La Familia. But when Batista turns, Edge hits him with the championship belt. Edge pins Batista for the 1-2-3! Man, talk about the Ultimate Opportunist. Winner: Edge *** It's time for the main event: WWE Champion Triple H vs John Cena. *** John Cena makes his entrance. Will he be able to bring the WWE Championship to Raw? *** Triple H makes his entrance. *** Michael Cole seems to be sucking up (blame the writers heh) saying Triple H cou ld be the poster boy for Night of Champions. You know, 12-time champion, blah b lah blah.*** "Quite frankly, I'll be pulling for John Cena to bring back that title to Monda y Night Raw," Jerry "The King" Lawler tells Michael Cole. *** Is Cena the new Hulk? The King says "one thing Triple H doesn't want to do is g et John Cena angry." Cena: Please don't make me angry. You can't see me when I'm angry. *** Cena kicks out of the Pedigree. *** FU connects! Cena goes for the pin, but Triple H kicks out! *** Cena and Triple H exchange punches. "It's almost as if they're trying to knock sense into each other," The King Say s. Cena finally connects with the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Third time's a charm. *** Triple H goes for the Pedigree again, but Cena counters and locks in the STFU. Will Triple H tap again? *** Triple H reaches the ropes, but Cena pulls him back to the center of the ring. Triple H counters with the Crossface. Cena refuses to tap. Cena then uses his strength to lift Triple H into an FU position, but Triple H counters with the Pedigree! Triple H covers Cena for the 1-2-3! What a great win! Winner: Triple H *** Well, Night of Champions had a number of boring matches, but that Triple H-John Cena war was a great way to end the PPV.