I am not a morning person, but I sure do want to be one.

Waking up early is such a struggle. I do realize the morning tug-of-war begins with turning in late at night. That said, I know I should sleep earlier. But the bulk of my relaxation time comes in during late evenings after work — unwinding by playing video games, late dinners with the husband, a DVD before bedtime. I wanted to try waking up early one time though. It was difficult, but worth the try.

It started with setting the alarm 30 minutes earlier than usual. No pressing of snooze buttons allowed! Within those thirty minutes, I was able to:

Enjoy quiet time with myself. The sunlight was slowly streaming through the windows. There was a tall glass of hot lemon water across me. I was sitting quietly on the couch, not thinking of anything at all, just enjoying the calming bliss of that moment. Connecting with myself first thing in the morning was refreshing.

Calm my nerves. Getting out of bed is typically followed by my routine of heating water, munching on fruit, drinking water, taking a shower, rushing to work. It feels connecting the dots under time pressure. This time though, I was able to pace the chores in a gentle manner. There was no need to panic as there was more than enough time to get everything together.

Eat a good breakfast. Instead of eating breakfast at work, or worse, skipping the meal, I was able to prepare a healthy, filling morning meal. Better yet, I was able to enjoy every morsel of it. No quick munches on fruit, no big gulps of water to wash it down. It was a breakfast date with myself that I thoroughly enjoyed.

This went on for a couple of days until a late night sent me back to my old ways. Mornings were panicky again and I completely forgot about the beauty of those morning moments with myself.

And then I stumbled upon a post in Zen Habits called 10 Benefits of Rising Early and How to Do It. The entry talked of how getting up earlier is good for you, and shared tips on how to achieve that morning nirvana. While reading it, the memory of that early morning sunlight came back to me, and I resolved to greet the morning earlier than usual again.

It starts tomorrow.

Are you a morning person? Do you enjoy quiet times in the morning? Share your happy morning experiences. Let’s learn from each other.

“Remember, there are no mistakes, only lessons. Love yourself, trust your choices, and everything is possible.”
- Cherie Carter-Scott

SELF-doubt is one of the biggest stumbling blocks to finding happiness within oneself. There have been many times when I felt I wasn’t strong enough, mature enough, intelligent enough, deserving of some things that came my way. Because of self-doubt, several opportunities have passed me by. Some opportunities I may have noticed whooshing past me, others may have just quietly retreated into the shadows of my self-doubt.

It may be confused with humility, which could be defined as accepting praise quietly or that sincere and silent feeling of self-worth. If you’re not careful though, it could quickly cross over into self-depreciation, feeling you have very little worth. Once you’re in the realm of self-doubt, the downward spiral begins. How do we avoid this stumbling block?

Self-respect is key. I could throw a gazillion cliche lines at you: “Believe in yourself.” “Love yourself.” “Trust your instincts.” Cliche they may be, but they work. They are true. The only way you can “undoubt” yourself is to have stronger self-conviction, to have a stronger sense of who you are. It is not easy, especially when you’re already sucked into the black hole of self-depreciation. But the ability to overcome self-doubt lies within you.

Talk to close friends and family. If believing in yourself is difficult, why not hear what your trusted peers and family members have to say? Think of the people in your life who have always stood by you, who have always supported you with their sincerity and their honesty. The last thing you need is a hypocrite pushing you on, so do turn to trusted loved ones. The people who’ve kept me from drowning in a sea of self-doubt have always been my parents and my husband. I am very thankful that their support is always sincere, always solid. Who are the people in your circle you believe can sincerely cheer you on?

Try exploring groups sharing your same interests. Let’s say you are doubting your skills as a photographer, that you don’t think you’re deserving of some offers coming your way. What if you join a hobby group and sharpen those skills? What if you build your confidence by learning from experts and from peers? Your progress will build your self-confidence, and you’ll begin trusting in your skills more.

Trust your instincts. You know that gnawing feeling in your gut when you feel something is or isn’t right? Does your pulse race when you’re convinced about something but don’t understand why? That could be your instincts telling you something. Listen to your instincts. Listen to that primal thing in you — it’s trying to tell you something. More often than not, it’s telling you to carry on, to trust in your choices. Listen to them more. Trust in them more.

Perhaps you’ve been burned in the past by wrong choices. Perhaps fear of the unknown is crippling you into moving forward. There will always be a reason to doubt yourself, but there are more reasons why you shouldn’t. It’s more difficult discovering reasons for the latter, but when you do find them, you will become a little bit wiser, your world will become a little bit bigger, and yes, “everything else is possible.”

WHICH quote resonates with you more when it comes to family: “Absence makes the heart grow fonder” or “Out of sight, out of mind”?

When it comes to family, I believe in keeping them close no matter how geographically distant they are. Getting disconnected is so easy — a son moves to college and loses touch with his parents, a newlywed couple begins a home of their own, grandparents stay in retirement homes, a father works overseas to support his family. There are many reasons why a family can be physically disconnected. It’s a natural thing, nothing wrong with that at all. What we may fail to remember is to stay connected, no matter how geographically distant family can get.

Keeping your family close to you is a good reminder that you have a loving support system. It may not work with all family members, as each one has his own quirks, but perhaps there is one family member or two you can securely stay in touch with.

Social networking sites have allowed me to rebuild relationships with my cousins overseas. E-mail has always been a good way to stay in touch. And then there is of course the now occasional snail mail for the technophobes or the oldest generation in the family. There are many ways to reconnect and stay connected. The results rely on acting on these many ways.

Share stories with family. Throw in some pictures in the mail. Perhaps they too want to know what’s going on with you, they just don’t know how to get started. What if you take the first step in rebuilding that connection?