By Francis Ochoa

OF THE MANY THINGS written about the Arnold Palmer Invitational, one anecdote nearly went unnoticed. A wire report told the story of the last few moments before Tiger Woods fired the title-clinching 15-foot putt on the 18th green.

As woods lined up the putt, a lone figure from the crowd coughed out: “Playoff.”

That was really all Woods needed to hear.

“Maybe he missed the Arnold Palmer Invitational the two times Woods made a 25-foot birdie putt on the last hole to win. Perhaps it was his first time to see the world’s No. 1 player, and he wasn’t aware that Woods has been making big putts like this since he was a
Teenager,” the wire report went.
It really didn’t matter what the man’s motives were. Tiger launched the putt and went on to win his 66th PGA Tour title.

Tiger Woods, three tournaments into his comeback from a knee injury, is officially back. Oh sure, he got booted out of his first tournament—match play format. And in the second at Doral, he was so far out the leaderboard that the eventual winner, Phil Mickelson, said he missed having Tiger lurking near the top and having to fend off the world’s greatest golfer.
Normally, Tiger would’ve read the Phil quote in the papers and responded with a snarl: “Be careful what you wish for.”

Instead, Woods managed an all-too-friendly “Me too! Me too!”

Well, Tiger returned to the top. Sadly, at the Arnold Palmer tournament, Phil wasn’t there to revive the feeling of going against Woods in the championship flight.

In Mickelson’s place was Sean O’Hair, who led by five shots at the start of the final round. Any of those five strokes would have come in handy for O’Hair in the last hole, with darkness slowly overcoming the Bay Hill golf course in Orlando, Florida.

But there were none available. After a dramatic par putt on 14 and a 25-footer in the next hole, Woods had gobbled up all those five strokes and O’Hair was officially toast.

“It feels good to be back in contention, to feel the rush,”Woods said. “It’s been a while, but God, it felt good.”

Woods thus grabbed the navy blue jacket awarded to winners of the event after almost a repeat performance from last year, when he won the same title by coming back from a deficit and needing to sink a birdie in the final hole to clinch the trophy.

The putt, which left O’Hair in awe, got added to the list ofdramatic moments that Woods had provided for the game of golf. The last of those dramatic moments came in the US Open last year when Woods, operating on one good knee, sank two clutch putts—one to force a playoff and one to win the tournament—to deflate Rocco Mediate.

“It’s just a little bit disappointing that I couldn’t close it,” O’Hair said.

“I’m trying to compete against Tiger,” he added. “It’s not like it’s ’The Tiger Show’ and I’m just out there to watch him. And I think that’s the one thing the media thinks about the guys out here, and it’s not about that.

“We’re trying to win golf tournaments,” he said. “And he just happens to be that good.”
Now everybody’s thinking: What’s next. As if you didn’t know.

“As I look back at my three tournaments I’ve played this year, I’ve gotten better at each one,” Woods said. “And that was the whole idea, to keep progressing to Augusta.”

This time, Woods will be playing for bigger stakes. Anyone dare bet against the guy in The Masters?

THE BEAUTY OF golf makeup is that most people won’t even realize that you’re wearing any at all! They’ll simply think that you were born that way …and you were. We were crafted to look exactly as we do (Jeremiah 1:5) for His own perfect reasons. It’s one thing to hit the greens on regulation … it’s another to do it lookin’ like a hottie. Natural summer makeup is necessary if you want to pull off that “golf-diva-sun-goddess look” and give your ho-hum 200-yard drive a little ‘oomph’. Here are a few creative D-I-Y solutions to turn your total golfer-girl-next-door-look from boring to BEAUTIFUL!

You don’t need to spend a lot or have a makeup bag overflowing with tons of products in order to look good. Truth is, as long as you know which shade fits best on you, you only need a few essentials in your makeup bag for your everyday gorgeous golfing needs. It’s all about enhancing your God-given features and complementing your ‘look’ with confidence and the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit. Basic makeup essentials are also important for women who are constantly on-the-go (a.k.a. those “late for tee-time” moments, re-touches at the halfway house, and “OMG there’s a possibility I just might win!” awarding nights), because sometimes you just need to photo-finish yourself in a hurry!
A smooth and even complexion—gets everyone’s attention in broad daylight, when you’re hitting balls at the range, or reading the greens. Instead of applying layers and layers of foundation and blending, which can easily look overdone, just dot concealer over the red or pale areas (like your T-zone, around your eyes, chin, and corner of your lips). Lightly tap with your finger to help the product melt onto your skin. Powder the rest of your face to even out everything with a mineral powder that matches your skintone—err to the slightly darker tone when choosing between two shades.

Often overlooked, your brows say a lot about your beauty routine! Neat and tidy brows really make a BIG DIFFERENCE in pulling your look together, FAST! Follow your natural arch while you tweeze any hairs that fall above or below the natural contour of your brows. With a Shu Uemura hard formula brow pencil, draw gentle, light, feathery strokes following your brows toward the outside of your face. (Tip: If you have really long eyebrow hair, you might consider trimming it to get a more refreshed and lighter overall look or using Shu Uemura’s eyebrow manicure, a waterproof eyebrow mascara.)

Wearing too much makeup is just trying too hard. Besides, no guy has ever thought, “I wish she were wearing more on her face!” Instead, concentrate on the basics and define the features you were blessed with. Appreciating nature is a privilege golfers enjoy all the time as we play our sport. So, appreciating and enhancing the beauty God has given us women, as His most complex and amazing creation, is a far better privilege!

Oakley products are available at selected outlets and pro shops, Nike, Paradiso, Carnoustie, TourStage and Etonic products are available at PacSports stores in golf clubs and malls, Adidas apparel and footwear at brand stores in major malls.

The Larry’s Cup is all about the celebration of Larry Mendoza’s birthday and the friendship his family shares in government service with just a hell lot of people foremost among them President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo and First Gentleman Mike Arroyo.

It speaks of who Larry Mendoza is and the power he wields.

FG and sons Mikee and Dato joined the tournament played at the west course of the Wack Wack Golf and Country Club where he spends most of his golfing time nowadays and stayed till evening to join the President in enjoying the entertainment prepared for Secretary Mendoza’s special guests.

But forget about the politics that can be smelled from it, a golf tournament is special if its well-run, well-organized, well-prepared and well-attended.

Those who played at west course of Wack Wack Golf Country Club for two days and the warm hospitality they were accorded can always say that golf has a soft spot in the heart of Mendoza, the secretary of the Department of Transportation and Communications and also the president of the National Golf Association of the Philippines.

For Mendoza and his two sons, Batangas Rep. Mark and businessman Jek-jek, golf is a family game and there couldn’t be a better way to gather their friends for an important occasion in the family than putting them all together at the golf course.

The tournament winners:

Overall champion: Ricky delos Santos 59 points
Low gross champion: Rudy Amata 68
Class A: 56 Iggy Clavecilla, 55 Jun Arceo
Class B: 55 Bashadil, 55 Tim Abejo
Class C: 38 Rupert Bayocot, 38 Nathan Leslie
Class D: 35 Jorge Yulo, 33 Regino Catiis
Ladies: 36 Evelyn Garcia, 35 Glydel Mercado

I was just finishing 18 months of my ME program in the Asian Institute of Management. Prior to that, I was the official message writer of my family for family gatherings, greeting cards and family show scripts. My mind was still fresh from imbibing the lectures of my adviser and guru Prof. Ed Morato on self mastery.

Passion for whatever one chose to undertake was the vital consideration in any endeavour, my guru used to say. Golf was a passion for me. To say I loved the sport would hardly be an apt description of my devotion to practicing and playing it. I could not stop thinking about it, I would shift my weight during mass, practice the one piece takeaway while waiting in line or sometimes if I needed to walk a long way, I would practice gauging distances and count paces to train my distance estimation.

Writing about it was another story. I was not sure I could produce a column once a month.

What could I possibly write about month after month? I was not trained as a writer, nor was I a profound thinker not even in golf that anyone would be interested to read my column.

But I decided to give it a try on the condition that if my stories ever ran out, I could always stop writing. Besides, the magazine was free. All the reader had to do was turn the page or toss away the issue. I would not have to face any senate inquiry or civil suit.

What surprised me, however, is that I had stories to tell and I enjoyed writing these stories.

Definitely the literary liberties made the stories even more enjoyable to write.
The challenges of finding one every month became lighter as the deadlines came and went.

Has it been 10 years since March 2000? My life directions have taken turns every ten years.

I have chosen to pursue another undertaking that for now has taken much time from my golf game. The stories in my mind have veered away from the sport and toward something else. I feel that another passion has taken over me.
Suffice it to say that I dedicated myself to write the best that I could for every issue of IGM. I researched and prepared for every deadline piece. It pains me when I do not feel that I have written something that I am not proud to call my own.

I would rather stop writing rather than churn out mediocrity.

My current pursuit has nothing to do with golf, it certainly will take much of my attention and for the next year and will require all of what I have to give of myself.

The past ten years have been one big party for me. To all those that gave me the encouragement to keep writing, to those that sent in comments and suggestions, to my friends that gave me their stories to write and to my wife, who though is not a golfer, gave me the valuable advice on my writing and to my editor Jong Arcano and the Inquirer family, I thank you for the opportunity to write for IGM.

I enjoyed this experience. I am surprised to have gotten away with pretending to be a writer all these years but then again I suppose the passion for the game has given me something like the apostles tongues of fire.

Whatever it was, this has been a blast for me.

Till the next time, palo mga bata!
<em>(I’ll take the liberty to tell those following the monthly columns of Arsenic that he’s going to fight the biggest battle of his life next year when he runs for public office. Running has been great part of the life of Arsenic, a champion athlete who once held a record in UAAP track and field. We will certainly miss the wit and humor of a La Sallianand his terms of endearment not only for his wife and sons but his mother-in-law as well. Such a great family man so different from golfers we know. Suffice to say that the Inquirer Golf’s loss is a big gain for that part of the country where he is targetting to be its trusted servant. We can only wish him the best for this long journey and we’ll be too happy to address him Congressman Sir just in case he’ll decide to re-occupy the space he held for exactly 10 years and write about what he loves best after next year’s elections. So long Arsenic, may you be an agent of change in this country we dearly love-Ed) </em>

Accepting reality is often hard to do when people get blinded by illusion.

Haven’t we seen enough of tournaments whose winners are disgraced by their handling or ignorance of the rules?

Rodel Mangulabnan is a breath of fresh air.

The men’s division winner of the recent National Tournament of Champions at Eagle Ridge which we organize, decided recently to return the trophy when he found out that he had used an illegal equipment.

His driver—a Maruman Exim Nano—bought four years ago in a local golf show is nonconforming.

Confusing as it may sound, the driver is not in the list of conforming and nonconforming clubs on the USGA and R&A websites as validated by Maruman of Japan. It was only because of a confirmation by Maruman International that a possible infraction dawned on Rodel.

In his letter to organizers, Rodel, says there was no intention to cheat: “I would like to emphasize that I had no intention of violating the Rules of Golf, in general, and the rule on Conforming Clubs, in particular, having exhausted all means at my disposal to check the legality of the driver that I used.”

He waited for the e-mail from Maruman before he finally accepted the fact that the driver was illegal. He then made one of the most difficult decisions in his life.

“As an advocate of the Rules of Golf, I find that the only honorable thing to do is to return the trophy.”
Such an honorable act, indeed.

The Inquirer and its technical team believe after careful evaluation that there is no longer anything we can do to penalize Rodel or disqualify him under the rules of golf. Rule 34-1 guides us on issuing claims for match play while 34-1b states that “. . .a player knew before competition closed that he was in breach of any other Rule for which the penalty is disqualification.”

It all came down to whether Rodel believes it was worth keeping the NTCC trophy in his cabinet. He felt that it was better to give it back and just try to win it again—with a conforming driver—next year.

Several lessons can be gained from the Mangulabnan case but I hope that the we all see the true beauty of winning with honor, dignity and legitimacy.

Let me end this month’s column with an open letter to Rodel.

In behalf of the Organizers and the Tournament Committee of the 2009 National Tournament of Club Champions we hereby accept your decision to return your trophy as the men’s division winner.

We would like to commend you for your sense of honesty and fair play which all the more exemplifies the proper attitude and decorum that is to be expected from a player of the game of golf.

This only shows how much you value the principles that create a framework where golfers can compete in a spirit of friendly, fair and honest competition. For this, we see you as a true champion of not just National Tournament of Club Champions but the game of golf as well.

We wish you well in your next tournaments and we can only look forward to seeing you do it again when we return to Eagle Ridge next year.

For comments and suggestions, please e-mail jarcano@inquirer.com.ph

On April 21, Hechanova starts a fresh stint as assistant general manager, completing a potent team of managers at the multiawarded club that also counts Junie Ledesma (general manager), Tim Walker (course superintendent), Mary Grace Estuesta (golf director) and Singaporean chef Joseph Goh.

Hechanova was formally introduced to the members of his new home during the Sta. Elena Cup (see separate story on page 30).

Sta. Elena’s hiring of Hechanova is seen to bolster its competitive edge in the industry. Aside from being an outsourced maintenance firm for exclusive courses in the Luzon (Tagaytay, Wack Wack and Poro Point), Sta. Elena Properties is also into real estate development and event management.

KING’S COURT: King Stehmeier is leaving his post as assistant general manager of the Alabang Country Club. He is resigned effective April 15 and will join the Adeo real estate firm of John Papa, his regular partner in member-guest events, as one of its directors.

REINSTATED: Rod Feliciano, finally regained his full privileges as member of the Manila Golf Club with the lifting of his suspension by the club. Feliciano had engaged the Forbes Park Club into a legal tussle as a result of his suspension the root cause of which was an altercation with Anthony Te, son of club pillar Macario.

ALABANG ELECTIONS: Contesting the three slots for the Alabang board on April 14 with their club affiliations are Roberto Atendido (Parmers), Ricky Canlas (515), Federico Pascual (0 Club), Resty Perez (Asshol), Louie Sison and Leo Villanueva (515).

DUNLOP FRANCHISE: After dismantling its Philippine staff, Dunlop International has awarded the local distribution of its golf and tennis products to Dynamic Sports and Leisure Corp.

PHILIPPINE OPEN: The National Golf Association of the Philippines is pushing for the holding of the Open on May 28-31 at the Mt. Malarayat Golf and Country Club. Officials are confident that they would be able to raise the $300,000 minimum purse required by the Asian Tour but the Ngap will be organizing it on its own.

GOLF DIGEST: Hinge Inquirer Publications is no longer renewing its contract with the Condenast Publishing firm for the Golf Digest franchise. The April-May issue with young director and single-handicapper Paul Soriano on cover will be the final issue for Golf Digest under Hinge. Top executives of Condenast came over last month to negotiate with giant publishing firms, among them ABS-CBN and Summit, but nothing definite has come out of it.

WITHDRAWAL: Wack Wack pulled out of the Ladies Federation Golf League midway in its title-retention campaign. The root of contention? Handicaps, what else.

GOMA CUP: Richard Gomez, now re-inventing himself as a game show host with his top-rating Family Feud on GMA 7, is holding the Goma Cup Reunion on April 22-25 at the Fairways and Bluewaters in Boracay. Goma and his celebrity friends will be battling it out not just on the fairways but also in the sea with watersports events slated.

PASSINGS: Erlinda Que, mother of professionals Angelo and Michael, died after a long battle with cancer last March 9. Jun Hidalgo, golf director of Lakewood Golf Club in Cabanatuan, died March 23 due to complications from a suspected bout with colon cancer.

Under clear skies and a cool breeze blowing from the Taal Lake, the participants enjoyed the best weather possible and the splendid course condition made things even better for everyone.

“We’re very happy with the turnout, it really exceeded our expectations,” said Splendido general manager Teboy Javier.

Javier and his team prepared a special tournament for those who made the trek to the scenic layout, providing each player a pair of the latest-model Mizuno golf shoes not to mention the sumptuous food for the day courtesy of Delimondo.

Norie Casalme and Mansue Lukban (members) and Antono Cabangon and Ricky Alegre (guests/sponsors) led the winners by topping Class A with 46 and 43 points, respectively.

Jay Enrile, grandson of Senate President Juan Ponce Enrile in whose honor the tournament was held, represented the host family. He graced the occasion together with top jungolfer Miguel Tabuena.

Event sponsors were Hinge Inquirer Publications, Business Mirror, Ceza, Golforce, BanCom, RCBC, Ladera Culinary Services,Inc., Delimondo, Taal Vista Hotel, Sofitel, Poter’s Ridge Hotel, Santis Delicatesen, Fury Eyewear, Pilipinas Golf, Netforce, La Costa Spa, Club Car, Texas Eagle, Yamaha, Mizuno, Coke and Ducks Unlimited.

The results:

Members Division

Class A: Norie Casalme-Mansue Lukban 46 points, Rufino Javier-Ralph Lantion 41
Class B: Juanito Chua-Antonio Tan Jr. 49, Paul Chuatico-Noe Lopez 42
Class C: AS Tanjanco-Manolet Go 48, Joey Macadaeg-Wilfredo Placido 41
Class D: Wilbert Loa-Danny Yu 49, Jun Caramat-Anton Abad 45

Guest/Sponsors Division

Class A: Anton Cabangon-Ricky Alegre 43, Katy Katigbak-Gerald Katigbak 40
Class B: Rene Chua-John Braganza 59, Bap Fugoso-Dax Garcia 47
Class C: Vic Marquez-Leovi Morpe 52, Willie Tee-ten-Joe Dagdagan
Class D: Cholo Labog-Joe Cabacan 46, Samuel Lazo-Percival Santos 45

MONDAY IS CADDIES’ day, and nowhere in this country is this day regarded with more respect than at Davao’s Apo Golf. No one knows for sure how this had come to be.

Did it start because of an influential member’s magnanimity, after recognizing his own caddy’s exemplary talent in golf, had insisted that the club encourage its caddies to learn the game?

Or could it have been the stories of greatness, of scruffy young Davaoeno caddies born to poverty who would later earn nationwide popularity for winning one tournament after another, and who would in time be able to buy their own house and car not just in Davao, but in Manila as well?

Perhaps it could be because Apo Golf, open for play for more than four decades now, still has a low playing population that is more lenient and generous about letting caddies playing on Mondays, and even allows them to use the driving range and practice greens.

There could be other reasons, and Martin Luke Misa offers another one. As general manager of Apo Golf, he makes the effort to give more than normal attention to the grooming of caddies that will represent the club in various regional and national tournaments.

Caddies are encouraged to hone their drives and putts through a series of elimination rounds. Those who qualify to the big events as the National Caddies Open are allowed to play five times a week. And what a treasure trove this system has spawned!—Cassius Casas, Tony Lascuña, Ferdie Aunzo, Jay Bayron, Marvin Dumandan, Boyet Zaragoza, and of late, Junel Ababa, Dante Bisera, Boyet Echavez, Sonny Gialon, and Rufino Bayron.

It is not surprising that the Apo talent pool has lately been the target of much poaching by big leaguers Canlubang and The Country Club. For a moment, you could almost hear the grumble in Martin’s voice, but as quickly, he moves on to describe what is being done to shore up their depleted ranks.

“We now have a training pool composed of the children of caddies,” he says. For two and half months during the summer, the kids are closely mentored by about six or seven former caddies whose value today rests more on their intuitive ability to teach golf.

Most all of Apo’s greats have passed through these teachers. The best, says caddie master Rex Zaragosa, could easily be 58-year old Pabling Bisera, uncle of Dante, one of the better known Apo golf products now with Country Club.

In the past, many a youngster would have received basic training from an older brother or father or close relative. Practice rounds are in the cloak of approaching darkness, always at the far-away nooks of the golf grounds where the clubhouse and its surrounding buildings were well out of sight.

As kids, they are technically off limits from the course grounds until they have reached their 18th birthday, an age deemed legal enough for them to take on a caddie job—and subsequently enjoy the perks of being able to play and practice on Apo’s fairways and greens.

This had been the route taken by past Apo caddies who had managed to make the mark. In their pre-teens, many of them would huddle within stone’s throw of the course’s major water hazards, waiting to dive for errant balls lying at the murky bottoms.

“Lake boys,” they were called, who tried to make a living selling whatever balls they retrieved. Jimmy Bayron, brother of professional golfer Jay and ICTSI rookie Rufino, says that the balls, at P5 a piece, would barely add up to buy a kilo of rice.

When the Bayron brothers were younger, they would wait for a neighbor, a former caddie who had a set of clubs, to come home from work. The siblings would then share the driver, woods, irons and the putter as they made the rounds of Apo golf’s 12th to the 16th holes, perhaps even twice over if the moonshine permitted, repeating, honing and improving on every shot.

Even today, in the shadow of these young boys’ success, Martin Misa would be able to faintly detect those surreptitious practice rounds when he makes his early morning inspections of the grounds. But as long as there is no vandalism, and the fairways and greens are left in playable condition, he doesn’t make a fuss. Chance encounters with lake boys too are infrequent; they often melt into the nearby trees when his presence is felt.

Having just seen his brother Rufino play at the recent PAL Interclub, Jimmy’s dreams are once again rekindled. He vows to work harder to qualify to represent the club at the caddies’ open.

As long as Apo members continue to encourage their caddies to excel, and as long as heroes rise from the ranks of the Apo caddies, it’s hard to douse this kind of passion.

And even when we could be cleaning up after our masters’ messes overseas, here at home our home economics are spic and span. Just look at a recent Bangko Sentral ng Pilipinas forecast and you just have to smile at the good news: Personal consumption, which has been growing by 4 percent every year over the past three decades, is not expected to slack off this year.

So, that only means the game goes on, because the financial storm buffeting other supposedly “greener pastures” is just a slight drizzle in our fairways.

High-end manufacturers would tend to agree, as several high-end models offered here are selling better than their entry level models.

Here are four interesting cases in point: The Lexus IS300, Mercedes Benz C350, Volvo S80 and performance brand Subaru Impreza WRX.

The newest kid on the block Lexus has for its entry level the 2009 IS300 sedan. It possesses a 2995cc six cylinder engine, has easy-to-access switches and a proximity sensor that is thoughtfully location-specific (you’ll be notified at which side or corner an obstacle is getting much too close for comfort). Creature comforts include cruise control, paddle shifter, seats with individual temperature controls, the works. All packaged in a P2.938-million price tag.

Lexus, the high-end cousin of Toyota, has been the number-one-selling luxury marquee in the US automotive market for the past seven years. So, this brand doesn’t come in with much of a handicap, mind you.

The high-end unit of the Mercedes Benz C Class closest to the much-coveted C63 AMG would be the C350 Avantgarde with AMG package. A brand new unit, powered by all of 3498cc and 6-cylinders, is tagged at P4.480 million.

The C-350’s design and equipment line emphasizes the car’s sporty side (with a sunroof to boot). We also note that the too-big-to-be-ignored Benz logo at the radiator grille makes a powerful statement, as the chrome band running right around the body accentuates the taut lines of the new C Class.

The engine’s power makes for a confident overtaking. The steering is precise, the ride is “tycoon-ic” (meaning a tycoon can center his thoughts more on moneymaking ventures than on the ride itself).

With a tempting 7G-Tronic 7-speed automatic transmission range, the driver can opt to shift manually with a nudge of the selector lever to the right or left.

One point, though, familiarize yourself with the voice recognition feature of the audio entertainment system, and the control levers right behind the steering wheel. The C350 is laden with driver’s side control features that one could confuse the cruise control lever with the turn signal stick (which we actually committed several times).

It would also be handy for the driver to know that there is an option to switch to the 4matic all-wheel-drive system (thereby improving grip on wet roads when accelerating, and a more dynamic driving experience on the dry roads).

WRC fantasy

No less than legendary precision driver Russ Swift used the new 2009 Impreza WRX Sedan lineup to exhibit his talents at the MIAS at the World Trade Center. On our part, we got to take for a spin the Impreza WRX hatch (tamer version of the WRX STI). We had no qualms with its supposedly slower top speed than the STI (220 vs 250), as this version was powered by the same horizontally opposed Subaru Boxer engine and exhibited the same road-hugging ability champion world rally cars are most known for. The WRX Impreza 2.5-liter turbo’s STI version, however, comes with the SI-drive which gives the driver 3-mode driving options. The STI produces more power and has a 6-speed transmission. One can also adjust the distribution of power between the front and rear wheels with the STI.

One turn off, though: if you find yourself in a Subaru stuck in traffic (perhaps along the northbound side of SLEX) coming home from a particular sub-par game, you will hate three things: The traffic, your putting, and the Subaru’s unforgivingly rigid clutch pedal.

Calm, safe Volvo S80

Volvo’s flagship sedan is the S80. The one we got to drive in was the variant powered by a 2.5-liter, five-cylinder engine with light pressure turbo and CVVT (Continuously Variable Valve Timing) mated to a six-speed, automatic driver-adaptive transmission with geartronic. Touted as one of the safest four-door luxury haulers, the S80 is wrapped with numerous Volvo safety feature acronyms. To name a few, it has anti-lock brake system, traction control, antiskid system, curtain side airbags, and front side airbags. A multilink rear suspension counteracts any tendency to understeer while enhancing stability, and results simply in a ride to “sleep for.”

Everything about the S80 exudes comfort, convenience and class. The cubby holes are spacious, the center consoles ultra-slim, and a rear seat audio console incorporates sockets for personal headphones, and even allows passengers to choose audio sources, songs or playlists. The “B” pillar allows ventilation for rear passengers, and there’s dual zone electronic climate control as well.

It simply motivates you to play the gentleman’s game the way it should really be played: No flailing umbrellas, and no insulting columnists to ruin your game and your reputation.