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Looming epidemic: iFinger-itis

June 23, 2007 3:23 PM | No TrackBacks
After watching the iPhone Guided Tour and drinking deep of the Apple Kool Aid, I am gid dy with vicarious anticipation. However, I see on the horizon a medical conditi on that will afflict millions in the next few months: iFinger-itis. Everything that you can do on the new phone will be an orgy of finger tapping a nd sliding on glass. Dialling, texting, surfing, choosing songs and videos, set ting volume, selecting pictures and zooming in on them, tracing routes on maps, checking weather and more, all done on a square inch of skin on the tip of you r index finger. Will this take a toll on your skin? Will nail growth stunt? Will calluses form? Will you slip-and-slide your fingerprint to smooth oblivion, wearing down the ridges in time? Will your first knuckle swell with fluid? Will your pointer fin ger eventually grow into a heavy, swollen, calloused, horny stone-like appendag e that will forever lose its sensitivity, the ability to caress a loved one's s kin or comfortably point to a direction without straining your wrist? Will you forever lose the skill of handwriting, or by chance injure innocent people when you unthinkingly and carelessly shake hands? This iPhone is a menace, I tell you.

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