I woke up to an ache in my chest as I read the morning paper.
Mariannet, the 12-year old child who hanged herself last Nov. 2, was my daughter’s age. She is one of 11 million Filipinos who share a strange kinship with one billion more across the globe who live on less than a dollar a day. Her diary says she killed herself because she lost hope her family will ever get out poverty. Her wish list found in her diary was short: a bicycle, a school bag and jobs for her parents.
“Gusto ko po sana magkaroon ng bagong sapatos at bag at hanapbuhay para sa nanay at tatay ko. Wala kasing hanapbuhay ang tatay at nagpa-extra extra lamang ang aking nanay sa paglalaba,” she said in her “Wish Ko Lang” letter. [I wish for new shoes, a bag and jobs for my mother and father. My dad does not have a job and my mom just gets laundry jobs.]
This morning, as my daughter asked for her baon to go to school, I carefully looked at the P100 bill and kissed her goodbye. She gave me a warm hug and my heart constricted. I saw Mariannet instead, pleading to her father for P100 she needed for her school project.
A hundred pesos seems like a very small amount. My daughter will probably spend most of it on lunch at the school cafeteria and candies, not aware it could save someone’s life.
A few column inches away from the story on Mariannet, the Philippine Daily Inquirer banner story reads: Senate probes cash gifts. It talks of bundles of cash stuffed in envelopes and brown bags given to politicians one fine day in Malacañang.
Right there, we can see that Mariannet was right smack in the middle of the crux of life’s problems here in our country and around the world. Right there, we can raise our fists at government and say where is your heart? Releasing a P1-billion hunger fund is not the real solution! But Lingayen-Dagupan Archbishop Oscar V. Cruz has a better answer. He says when an 11-year old child hangs herself because of poverty, somehow we are all to blame. The community is to blame. The society is to blame.
A few months ago, the Asian Development Bank released a study that showed in figures how the rich are getting richer and the poor are getting poorer. The middle class is vanishing, it said. A separate article I was writing made it clear that the emerging middle class in this country are, unfortunately, not in this country but working abroad as professionals, seamen, teachers, nurses, caregivers and household workers.
Those in Manila who could buy what they want, send their children to school, save for the future, dabble a little bit in stocks or bonds may feel alienated from the problem of the vanishing middle class. They may say, so what? I have hope. I have money. I am preparing myself for the future.
Unfortunately, rising poverty will affect us all. The more Mariannets there are, the less Filipinos there will be who can buy the products and services you are selling. Who can afford to go to school. Who can be skilled workers in our technology hubs. Who can become retail investors that will buoy up our capital and bond markets. As two songs go, the circle of life ensures that we are all in this together.
It makes sense for everyone’s financial future to wipe out poverty — even the ruling elite’s financial future. Even politicians’ financial future. As you prepare this day to make more money, save more and invest more, please do two things: look around you for someone like Mariannet and do something about it. Then continue to make your dreams for financial independence come true so you can help more like her.
March 18th, 2008 at 4:47 pm
i want to tell the child “how stupid her action was!” i want to tell the parents of the child “you still have chances to teach your remaining children to treasure their lives over the fantacy of having things in which they don’t have. If you failed to give your children things they see others have, teach them to value “pagsisikap, pagtitiis at pagmamahal sa sarili” so they won’t imitate their sibling who desperately killed herself for a piece of request she will never ever have.” I want to tell the government officials, “your corrupt minds corrupt and make people so hungry for corruption. Different faces of corruptions happen around the country through witty strategies, perform by us, citizens of this country. For our officials, instead of showing good examples, they themselves are corrupt.” i want to talk to the people of this country, “I feel sorry for what our anscesors did for the benefit of our time, i feel like they are being dismayed by us. They fought for the country, they showed deeper concern..brotherhood, love and passion to seeing each and everyone of them enjoying what they intended to embrace upon, the freedom, peace and concern to one another. We are failing them for every act of selfishness. Our self-centeredness character drives us away from seeing the need of others.” I want to tell my self, “Do something and not blame others as what you are doing right now. Blaming others won’t help but will worsen the wound.” Lastly, i want to tell God how sad i am for what the child did. He gave her life, but she waisted it. We are moved, but it was a wrong way of moving our hearts! “May you strengthen our minds, hearts and souls so we may present ourselves to you humbly and fearfully. And that you may eventually tell us, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant, well done!”
May the story of the child won’t happen again. May we have the gift of discerning other’s cry for help before any worse may happen. May we show our care not after the death of a horse who no longer needs the grass…red
December 17th, 2007 at 8:47 am
The blame goes mostly to the parents who keep having children they can’t afford to raise. I know; I came from a family like this. Most of my relatives are too stupid to know any better, only having children as their form of social security. It takes a strong/smart person to get out of this selfish and stupid mentality.
Some of the blame also goes to the corrupt government who choose to pocket the money instead of investing it by providing jobs.
If you want to change the world, change the world within you. I continue to remind my relatives this as I do what I can to help them with their finances.
December 6th, 2007 at 4:50 am
it’s very amusing, the wisdom of men truly is. blaming, patronizing, agonizing, empathizing, influencing, evaluating, judging, self-emulating, castigating, self-righteousnessing(just rhyming), self-conveniencing(hehe) and so on. it sounds like no one is getting nowhere. isn’t it high time to find out what the one true wisdom is?
anyway, it’s a forum where everyone can express her/him-self(self-excusing).
November 20th, 2007 at 5:31 am
Dear Cecilia, thank you for sharing your story. I like what you said about “mentoring”. I think that’s a very worthwhile cause. It made me remember the story about that old man who threw one starfish at a time back into the sea. change the world one person at a time. it’s a risky process too, because each person has his own choice and after all that you do, things might not change. but one wise person said the worst thing good people can do is to do nothing. Great work, Cecilia!
November 19th, 2007 at 2:08 pm
I followed the thread of this 11 yrs old girl’s tragic story- that could have been me at that age….looking back now, I must have been exposed to v.sad traumatic experiences at a very young age, because I experience bouts of “sadness”;but my spiritual belief was strong enough to “hold” me. And I was so
grateful now to remember that there was a “teacher at grade 3″ , who had the time
to set me aside (one lunchbreak) to tell me of her concerns about my falling attendance and grade at school. I was “babysitting” my mom’s other kids….
I was her firstborn (5 going to 6 half bros and sisters?). My mom then needs to earn
a living w/ her 2nd partner, only my sickly Lola was at home..? My 3rd grade teacher put things in perspective for me…
my 9 yrs old brain understood this at that time….like this- being in school is not important ‘coz my desire was to help out my granmother’s housework and looking after the kids ( I love those babies)…Another lunchtime break session with my teacher….and another session…
until she found out how my little brain and little world was working….She has belief in me…she said that I’m smart enough to do what I want in my life and even do better than so and so? Mrs Fuentes placed a challenge my way to spark some ambition in my heart…(was
anything in there?). I told her my “rhethorical” answers– I have to help my grandmother, and I love the kids.
I did promise to keep w/ my homework and if I miss a day or two…she keeps me
up with my backwork, so I could still be in the “honours list”. I did not even thought about myself then as an honours
candidate….No one at home give me praises about results of my school report?
You see, I lived with an Uncle and an Auntie(my father’s sister who could not bear a child), They adopted myself and my only brother in their household. We had someone to look after us and cook(Margarita).My foster dad’s philosophy is
to do learning in school when we’re home
we have to do chores, feed the pigs, the
chooks, the goats, the carabao and help in the rice field (harvestime/plantingtime).
So no homework done at home…I silently
di home work in my head, doing my chores
If he call out for me…I cant hear him….
I was thinking in my head. At 14 yrs. I had “behavioural” problems..? My Auntie thought (foster mom), She arranged for me to pay Mrs Fuentes a visit. I was very anxious to meet my Teacher, apparently
she became Guidance Counsellor in my previous school. She heard about my winning 2nd at an english oratorical competetion and 1st at “Tagalog” the previous year when I was freshman….and
a member of our high school’s debating team. How am I? How have I been?
I told her “I was alright”, but the truth was- I feel sad in my heart. I feel “blue”
Depressed about the future…? I did not feel like “I belong” to my family? to my mom? to my dad’s family in Manila? I feel like being moved form one home to another ? not belonging to any of them?
Auntie’s now are talking about moving me to another Auntie’s home so I could help the organize the maids during the day and
study at night to become a midwife..? I do not want to be a MIDWIFE!!! or a Teacher like my foster mom? NO, I do not want todo this??? I want something else with my life, but I do not have any “say”
about my own life. I did not tell her any of these thoughts……but she reads my facial expressions, my demeanor. Mrs Fuentes re-enforced her confidence in me,stating if only I believe more in myself.
The day I stood up in her class, when no one stood up to “make up” an action-dance movement to go with a new song we learnt that day….No ONE, she said. I
raised my hand apparently and showed courage that day (The School Principal was in our classroom observing the fresh and best 3rd yr class in the block!!!).
Courage to press on no matter what. She said about, Believing in myself MORE, and give myself the chance to do whatever it is I want to do in my life.
And I did…I was called “a black sheep” because I followed what my heart is prompting ….I went to Australia…..and Im preparing to come HOME…just like my Teacher- I will be encouraging to MOTIVATE those who needs to HOPE BIG in their hearts….specially kids like Marriannette. Compassion, education, “hands on” social work, money is important also to help move things……motivational speakers…..not angst with no positive fruit. Are YOU angry enough to make a difference? Use your anger as a positive vehicle to drive away poverty….DO something, guide a parent- educate if they are willing. Youi still have to ask their permission if you want to show someone the way. Adopt a family….adopt a child, sponsor her daily care plan, schooling. Be friend someone in your neighborhood…? Be a mentor if you have the capacity to do so…. and follow up…..the follow up is the most important aspect……the support is very important….to those times that we stumble…someone there to pick us up…
Some critique are so simplistic…I know how it feels like to be depressed at a very young age…because of what you see, what you hear amd what people do…and you can not say or tell..because
of putting shame to your family…taboo stuff…..e.g. to be parented by parents who do not know how to get out of their rut? is it a child’s fault? is it her parents?
Teach a brother, a sister……sometimes being in this poverty cycle will get one mentally ill…forever looking for a relief….
For one family, you need a mentor,advocate-social worker, a health nurse, a friend, a family to help them as your 24-7 family support (a family neighbor) who will take these jobs? without pay? Now we need “mega-phones ” those who are good with their gabs” {Media} Those activist type- eloquently persuasive in their speech…?
WHO can nail it in the heads of politicians….opening their hearts ……we can begin with one…find this person TODAY……….Cecilia Alcopra Beltran