Hi Salve,

Most of the Filipinos hire kasambahays not of legal age yet and I would like to know if that is lawful. Also, is there a need to issue kasambahays a contract of agreement before they start their service?

I have a kasambahay who is only 17 yrs old and we verbally agreed on her responsibilities and her salary. Though that is the usual practice of the Filipinos, I would like to know if that is the legal way of doing so. thanks.

It’s quite hard nowadays to find a good househelp. That’s why we treasure a good find whenever we found one.

But, too bad they don’t last long for us. Not because we dont treat them well but the family ties we Filipino’s had. In case their family needs them, they just go back and leave their employers behind with regret.

In my case, we treat them as a family member. Bring them along when we have party’s to attend and give them bonuses when we have one.

Bad thing about young househelps too is that their family gets a share of their salary, their parents just simply call and ask for a share

Let’s make sure we treat our househelps fair and value them.

I agree with you that households should be treated properly and humanely. I let my kasambahay eat whatever it is that’s available in our house. I cook food for her and I usually ask her to eat with us. Whatever is our ulam is her ulam also. I let her watch tv when she’s done with her work and when the kids are sleeping. I treat her like she’s a part of our family.

Sadly, some people abuse the kindness that others are showing them and my ex-kasambahay is one of those people. I can still remember the horrific experiences I had with my ex-household. The worst things she did were I caught her lying to me several times and she raised her voice at me when I confronted her about those lies. Being a liar and disrespectful (among other “attitudes” she showed us), I don’t think I can stand her anymore. She’s out of our lives now and I already have found a new kasambahay. I just hope this one is far from our ex-kasambahay.

My heart is crushed every time I hear stories of house helpers treated badly. It is bad enough to hear stories of OFW maids being mistreated abroad. It’s worst if a fellow Filipino mistreats a house helper.

I think it makes two to tango. Maids should also not mistreat their employers. Sometimes they are provocative too. Like sometimes they exaggerate stories to be the popular maid around the neighborhood during windy afternoons outside the gate or in the park. Worst, I know some maids that spit on their employers meal to get even.

For employers, respect begets respect. Start treating your maids like part of the family and she would start to be one. Spoil them occasionally by treating them when they go out of their way to think of your needs. Our maid is the commander in the house. She gets to select the food we eat (can even cook her own food) and can stay up late to watch her favorite Filipino movies. She is a jewel.

She started working for us when I was still in grade 4. Now I’m already working she’s still the one who takes care of household needs. The best compensation one employer can give is respect, concern and care.

It is true that its hard to find excellent househelp these days. Since I gave birth, we have had 2 excellent yayas. We treated them well. They have bonuses, Christmas gifts, etc. We have meals together in the same table with the same food. In fact, lahat ng mga naging yaya namin tumaba.

It then became a wonder to us why we cant keep them and we just recently discovered why. Its because my brother-in-law wasnt treating them well (di naman abuse but I’m afraid he sees them as inferior to him and treats them that way too, which is sad). He is single and between jobs and has been with us since college. I cant help getting pissed off since we can do without him, but not without a yaya. But in the Philippines where extended families abound (and generally accepted), its our responsibility to see to it that our househelp are treated well by other members of the family as well.

we had a househelp that lasted almost 40 years and another one almost 15 years. The secret? we treat them as my sisters. They eat with us, we watch tv, go to movies together. They can ask for loan and if it is not much.. hindi na kailangan bayaran pa. Sometimes we (when we were kids) borrow money from them too..but we pay. heheh. We also help them with their chores. I still remember when my family were in financial trouble (early 1980’s) that we have to live by the day … ika nga. The kasambahay did not leave us… no paycheck for her for almost 4 years. I was still in college then… she stick it out for us. Out of pity for her, my brother recommended her to her employer-doctor and worked their for almost 5 years as the mayordoma. She worked for us almost 15 years… 4 years of those are gratis….she’s maried now and still visit us once in a while… nowadays it is very difficult to get househelp that you can trust. How i missed the old days.

i miss my kasambahay. I treated her like family. she ate the same food I ate, treated her to movies.

When we went on vacation to my hometown (paete, laguna) roles changed when we served her and not the other way around. She slept all day and we only woke her up around eating time.

she was able to travel with us on some days when we brought the car. we’re thinking of giving her a raise after 1 year and paying her SSS contributions but when she got home, her mother didn’t let her return…

now we’re again hunting for a replacement..someone we can trust cleaning our room and return small bills left in pockets of my dirty clothes

btw, can you email me the company with that P1.5k annual premium? I know someone who needs that

i agree with robert. the key is to treat them like family. our maid lasted 25 years with us before she retired. another maid is with the family for almost 30 years now. treat them as equals and give them a sense of dignity.

we share the same food. we eat at the same time. she can borrow money from us and it gives her a sense of satisfaction to see she’s working to pay her debt off. if we get bonuses from work, the money trickles down and she also gets a bonus. she has SSS, philhealth, and a good amount of money set aside for her retirement.

question. what is the insurance that you mentioned? the one when it’s just P1400 per annum?

the real tragedy in all these is that some people spend the most productive part of their lives being house-help.

after decades of dedication to the families they work for, what do they have to show for it? a few thousand pesos tucked away in a bank account?

its not a rewarding job, no matter what other people say (ask anyone who post here if they would ever consider being househelp)…there is no lush retirement scenario at the end of it…no “promotion” in between…there’s no sense of accomplishment, only mundane daily chores…a life experience confined by the bounds of their employers’ capacity to pay and always secondary to their bosses’ needs and schedule…

expectation of humane treatment from employers is a given…its just really, really sad that there is not much beyond that…

reading all these comments about having your househelp eat the same food you eat and making it sound like that was an act worthy of special mention just made me sick…

sorry, but only pets don’t eat the food you eat…

My friend and her husband both work full time regular jobs, have children, and have monthly debt obligations like a lot of people I know. Their house help is sourced through an agency for a 2-year contract. Contract states house help works 8 hour days with overtime, days off every other weekend (and she can bring friends over as long as she asks permission first), a fully furnished room of her own with TV, and a car to use during the duration of her work contract. My friend provides health insurance and fare to and from the house help’s home country (Europe last year, Asia this year) for two weeks annual vacation. Toiletries, food, and the like are standard basic provisions. Base monthly salary is USD$1200-1500 as of 2007, net (so most of these could have gone to savings for the more financially astute house help). Strictly a business transaction, there’s a new house help every 1-2 years, sometimes less (one Ukrainian girl liked to party and spend a lot). The point — there’s a trade off in everything.

To be honest, the maid situation here in the Philippines is the most humiliating. They are paid for a pocket change (less than P5K a month), treated less than the household members, etc etc.
Yeah that sharing the same food as the household member like it was a favor is sickening.
And those maid uniforms in public places. My god! I find that tacky and insensitive.

When I was growing up and had a helper, my mother would threaten punishment to us kids if we as much ask her to fetch us a glass of water while we were not doing anything else.

I sponsored adult education for our 2 house helps who have only finished elementary , unfortunately, one got married and left , the other lost interest in studying and eventually went home to the province …

then when we got another 2 helps , one is interested in pattern making and sewing so I again sponsored their education (tuition, transport, meals, including school materials) for both of them , now we only have one house help as the other one was offered by her sewing teacher a job in her shop, we are happy she had upgraded her skills and she is really glad we helped her. We treat them as relatives and are paid above market rates..
She stayed with us for almost 3 years and actually the one who took care of our little daughter till she was 5 years old..the other one left behind is currently studying computer as she is more interested in computers than sewing, I lend her an old laptop she can treat as her own and we teach her anything we could , give her books to read, to further her knowledge so she won’t be house help for the rest of her life…hopefully helping them can make a difference on their lives…it is our way of thanking them for the peace of mind , taking care of our kids and our house while we both work for a living…

@ Oda & Ria:
Do you have house helpers? Do you offer them to eat steak from a fine restaurant with you and your loved ones?

@ Ria:
What do you say to those people who walk in public places wearing their uniforms because that’s their job requirement? Do you find it sickening? And how much do you pay your house helper?

Being a house helper is like being an employee in a company. When a person works in a company, he/she may have benefits but he/she is not entitled to all the benefits a company may give. And when a person decides to work in a company, he/she have to follow company’s regulations such as wearing uniform.

Seeing people wearing house helper’s uniform in public places is not really a problem because they’re wearing decent clothes afterall. What makes it look bad? DISCRIMATION.

P.S. I give our pet dog a share of food that we eat. He loves it more than dog foods.

@maffrey

we don’t have house helpers. we live in toronto.

obviously you missed the point about the food comment, and based on your response, you’re one of those employers who think highly of themselves when your househelpers “eat the same food you eat”

@maffrey

I don’t have a helper. I don’t need one.

What’s wrong with letting the house help eat steak? Did I miss a rule saying certain people are not entitled to eat the same food group other humans eat?

Maid uniforms - put yourself in their situation. Would you want to be seen in public wearing that?

@ oda:

It is sad that you judge other people who you do not know in the first place. Some people really talk as if they are better than others.

Why not try to get a house helper first and give her all the things that you think she deserves before you teach other people how they should treat their house helpers?

Save your judgment for yourself.

@Ria:

I didn’t say there’s something wrong with letting househelps eat steak. That’s just an example. My point is employers have a choice on whether they will give the same food that they eat to their house helpers or just provide them with a cheaper version of those foods for their meal. It depends on the budget of the employer and on the agreement between the house helper and the employer. Giving house helpers cheap version of the foods that the employers eat is not bad as long as the foods are decent and nutritious and as long as you don’t starve your house helpers and abuse them. So I guess letting your house helpers eat expensive foods that you eat is a privilege that is why most people commented about it in this blog.

It is not fair to say “sick” or “insensitive” or whatever to people who said they share same food they eat to their helpers or they let their house helpers wear their uniform in public places because you don’t know the situation of the employers and their house helpers.

The house helpers might have chosen to wear their uniform because that’s what they wanted even if their employers told them they can change clothes. Maybe they don’t want to bother themselves in changing clothes. Whatever reasons for that wearing uniform in public places, we don’t know- because we are not in that situation.

Really, it is presumptuous to say bad things to people you do not know who have house helpers and blame them and tell them how they should treat their house helpers.

What you feel is the right thing to do IS right for you. It is arrogant to think that others should think the same way as you do. If ever you needed a house helper and hired one, treat her the way YOU think is the proper way to treat her.

As for the uniform- I wouldn’t mind wearing one in public places. It is a decent clothing and house helper’s uniforms are somewhat similar to the uniforms of those who work in hospitals, right?

@maffrey.

we don’t have a helper bec we dont need one and bec its a luxury to have one here in north america. you actually have to pay them DECENT wages for them to be able to afford to eat the food they want to eat and feed their families with, and not the food you judge them fit to eat.

do you get it now? or do you still miss the point even if it hit you smack between the eyes?

if “eating the same food” as their employers eat is worthy of praise in your mind, that its a privilege for your helpers to look forward to food that you decided is “decent and nutritious” for them (yet substandard or cheap enough for you to eat something else, something better) as partial compensation for a LIFETIME’S WORTH OR SERVITUDE, then that is truly, truly, sad plight for your helpers….

if i was rich enough to have helpers in north america, i wouldn’t need to give them “steak from a fine restaurant”…they ‘ll buy and eat steak themselves from their own pockets.

why don’t you instead try paying your helpers a decent enough wage for them not to depend on the food you decide is “good enough” for helpers but not good enough for you?

lastly, that’s got to be the most pretentious quote of the day: “As for the uniform- I wouldn’t mind wearing one in public places. It is a decent clothing and house helper’s uniforms are somewhat similar to the uniforms of those who work in hospitals, right?”

go ahead and wear one.

@maffrey.

apparently, you also missed the point about the maid uniform. so allow me to spell it out for your: its a symbol of servitude for everyone to see.

its not whether they’re decent or not. its what it stands for. get it?

the comments before you went on your rant defending the existing maid situation in the philippines were comments on the sad plight of being a “katulong”. you obviously felt slighted enough by those comments to go on a rant, defend your actions and judge other people as judgmental. how ironic.

there is no escaping the fact that the socioeconomic situation in the phils is so bad that life as a katulong is better than life on the streets.

sadly there are employers of katulong, like yourself, who feel magnanimous in granting these people a fate better than what they would’ve gotten on the streets, even though the exchange of money or goods for their services is almost always ONE-SIDED.

p.s. do you pay your helpers minimum wage? is the food you give them proportionate to what they would’ve gotten if they got cash instead and bought the food they would’ve wanted to eat?

@oda:

I am very well aware of the situation of the house helpers here in philippines. What made me comment on your comment and Ria’s were:

“reading all these comments about having your househelp eat the same food you eat and making it sound like that was an act worthy of special mention just made me sick…”; and

“And those maid uniforms in public places. My god! I find that tacky and insensitive.”

You two talk as if you are better than others.

You could go on and tell people the do’s and the don’ts of treating house helpers, but really, would you mind telling all of us how do you treat your house helper? Ahh, you don’t have one. That explains why…

The statements “if I were this,..” and “if I were that,….” are nonsense because those are hypothetical. You’ll never know what you’ll do until you are in that situation.

I already have experienced wearing a house helper’s uniform in public places because I was once a house helper. I worked as one before I went to college to save money for my studies. I stopped being a house helper when the school year started because of my class schedule. Then I tried working in a 24-hr fastfood chain as a service crew, grave-yard shift. There was really not much difference in being a house helper and a service crew. Mas ngarag pa nga sa trabaho ang service crew kung tutuusin, so many things to do and finish before the next shift comes in, pero pareho lang din naman ng sweldo… Looking back, I feel proud of what I have done, walang nakakahiya sa pagiging house helper. Kaya nga I feel proud also whenever I see people wearing house helper’s uniform in public places (although I don’t require my house helper to wear one) that’s why I said there’s nothing wrong with that. Those people who look down at them, looking at them “differently”, sila na ang may problema.

To answer your question- yes, i pay my house helper minimum wage and the foods I give her among other things are way beyond to what she would’ve gotten if she got cash instead.

Before she started working for my family, I asked her if she wants me to give her her full salary so she can choose on what food she wants to eat or let me take a portion of her salary for her meal. She chose the latter. The issue regarding the food and the uniform is part of the agreement of the house helper and the employer.

Do you still miss the point even if it hit you smack between the eyes?

Much has been said.
PEACE!!!

after reading most of the post in this thread….. here’s my take….
facts…. please ask your househelp how much is her take home pay every month, less gas expenses, house bills, food bills, income tax etc…..
then, please ask your office employees how much is their take home pay after all those deductions…..

@oda, maybe it’s not fair to comment on something that you don’t have, i.e. you don’t have a maid yet…..

nobody wants to be a maid/kasambahay by choice…… circumstances happens, due to luck, or lack of qualification to do something else…… and since law of supply and demand applies….. maids in the philippines tends to be more affordable ….. compared to other countries in north america…..

Wow. You still fail to see the point. I think Oda summed it up pretty well.

“Giving the helpers cheaper food than the employers eat..” Amazing.

All I can say is, sadly, you are not alone.

“You two talk as if you are better than others.”

I’m going to speak for myself here. I only pointed out the reality of the situation. Fact is, some people treat house helps as someone of lesser stature than them and then make excuses about it. This discussion won’t be this heated if it’s only happening in my imagination.

Having no maid now is a moot point. It’s not too hard to know what’s going on.

If you employ double standards in treating your maids, the likelihood that they will also employ double standards in handling the food you put in your mouth, the clothes you cover your intimate parts, and your prized possessions is high.

I know of long time maids who are nicest as can be, yet, will drop the steak on the floor and serve it. Heck, I know one guy-maid who urinated in the juice… They had their own reasons. Maid or not, the desire to “get back” in some way when slighted is almost universal. You may choose not to act on it, but sometimes, you can only take so much.

Kindness begets kindness, however, there is also the saying “an eye for an eye…”

When you leave your toddler alone with the maid, what it is going to be?

P.S. I know of a former Imelda Marcos crony/blue lady (I heard that’s what they were called) who used to travel to the US just to get $200+ hair cut from a favorate Beverly Hills salon, but have now fallen into hard times. She’s an illegal alien who works as a maid for a surly old lady who does not think highly of Asians. Former blue lady complains the old lady accuses her of eating the old lady’s food. A friend said, “Isn’t that the way you used to treat your maids?” The former blue lady cried. Karma.

Sa amin naman, 4K ang sweldo ng helper per month. Tas may 13th month pay tuwing dec. Ang percentage increase nya, depende sa % increase ng sweldo ko. haha! VL pala meron din monthly. =D

how much ba ang salary ng helper ninyo? and ano ba ang average? benefits?

also, ang treatment ko sa helper ay semi professional, semi kapamilya (or kapuso kung sa kabilang station ang trip mo).

I respect her. I try to increase her engagement. I try to cap her utilization rate at 8 work hours per day. Pero dapat mag deliver sya ng maayos na trabaho since ito ang source ng income nya.

I’m not saying na this is a good practice, nor naghahanap ako ng validation sa inyo. I’m just saying ito ang realidad ng helper while employed sa amin.

@oda, ria, maffrey

Your exchanges are like a Christian and a Muslim debating - endless.

You were all exposed to different cultures (Western and Asian). What can be acceptable to one society, may not be for another. Muslims may find eating pork dirty and disgusting, but for others, it is perfectly fine.

Some cultures find eating with hands barbaric, but for the Indians, it is a way of life.

Let’s not bash someone for their opinion, especially if that is the norm in the society he lives in.

I have lots of American and European friends who for most of their lives never had house help. But when they migrated in Asia, they have a yaya for each kid.

As they say, “when in Rome…”