UPDATE: Added a Dolly Anne/Ruffa/Annabelle poll at the Vox Populi homepage.
THE WAY Annabelle and Ruffa parade the marital woes [of Ruffa and Yilmaz Bektas] on national TV is appalling!
Just this Sunday afternoon on both GMA and ABS-CBN Ruffa’s marriage was again the issue with a rejoinder from estranged husband Yilmaz while mother Annabelle was spewing invectives on GMA.
I hope the mother and daughter are happy with the media attention they got but for the life of me, can’t they settle the issues quietly and move on?
– Alona Briones, Fairview, Quezon City (via e-mail)
June 16th, 2007 at 12:15 am
This is one of the best comments written by Princesa…
A small analysis of the creation of a delusional Psyche: Ruffa GutierrezThe forces that shaped her becoming a self-serving criminal
I. Beginnings-
Ruffa was born to Parents who at that time eh namumulubi sa States where they migrated for a better life sana. Kaso nga her dad’s restricted by immigration & education issues to hold any managearial or exec position in a company and both her mom and dad then were limited by the language. Coz they were used to a life of fame sa Pinas, mahirap lunukin magbenta ng kaldero from having people idolize you. I assume at that point in their lives mom & daughter got close going house to house para mabuhay. Nothing is wrong with that, selling pots & pans is honest enough. Pero coming from a high pedestal at malaki ang ambisyon, mahirap yun sa mom niya seguro, na-feel ng kid. Im sure affected rin sila sa affluence ng neighbours o ng mga Middle class families sa palikid. As evidence of this one could see the absence of that part in her life sa website niya. Their life back in the US prior to migrating back to Pinas to rejoin showbiz is never talked about—-parang ikinahihiya. Unlike Leizl & Albert Martinez, theirs is an open book. One can only imagine the kind of conversations and musing mom and daughter had together, like — “Alam mo anak, sa Pilipinas importanteng tao tayo,” or “Iba na pagmayaman, we can enjoy designer bags and have servants,”. Things have to go really bad for a whole entire family to give up hope of ever making it in the U.S. I assume it did. One could easily assume that seeds of a fantasy-future life began to form in young Ruffa’s head where she’s got everything she wants without having to share (marami silang magkapatid sa mom pa lang niya, pano pa sa iba) with others or having to face the other family of your dad and share with them too. Psyche-wise, I believe this has planted in her mind that to have a happy life, you need wealth, which back then they didnt have.
2. Engaging with Fame and Fortune-
Ruffa’s mum & dad were not big stars, they were your usual artista. Today seguro you can compare what eddie had with, say, the fame Dennis Trillo has and the fame her mom had was questionable, she was a bold star after all and girls like her then came aplenty. That’s why she held on to Eddie, one gets more of a name when linked with a more favorable star.Coming back with Ruffa and the twins allowed them to enter showbiz easy what with the availability of work for child stars. Actually, mas may trabaho nun ang mga bata kesa sa parents hence anabel’s evolved role: manager and stage mum. Since showbiz is the only business they know its where they went enlisting the help of Kuya Germs and Inday badiday to get back. And get in Ruffa did. She was toast of the town, but she wasnt the only one. That’s Entertainment meant competition and back then, Carmina Villaroel, Aiko and even Greta were taking on roles she wanted, from teen to mature. To shine out in the Industry she learnt one thing: court intrigue. She talked like her mom and added the ’sosyal’ English twang so as to be considered ‘in’. For actors and actresses, they have to internalize a role to be seen as such, the teen Ruffa really did. To erase any other insecurity she had she took on a persona ‘beautiful princess’ that needed worshipping. She went into modelling and constantly promoted herself. Its true that at one point in time she got tired of it, hence, the elopement with Da silva, pero one can only go so much on starry-eyed love. She didnt want to lose her ideal life of fame becuase for her, oppositte non ay pagbenta ng pots and pans. The next Ruffa we saw tried hard to outshine people in acting, even doing ‘ST’, what other choice did she have? Then the MMFF Scam happened. Kasi w/o that recognition, you are just another actress. Yun ang gold standard ng artistang Pinoy. She wanted it so it didnt matter that what they did was criminal. Her psyche demands her to work at not being poor or being ordinary so laws be damned. When you see your mum and your manager and others agree to do the crime, for a teen, then it isn’t.Big mistake and bigger scandal. At that point her mom and her found out that scandals dont really sell if it shows your real character and found themselves not needed by Pinoy showbiz again.
3. Risking Dignity for Money-
What would you do when despite the fact that you know your beautiful the public despises your character and you need money? You turn to one of the oldest professions in the world. It need not be said what it is. Its enough that covertly beauties from Pinas showbiz who find themselves out of work come in plane loads to fill the Sultan’s harem. After all, is he not one of the richest men in the world? This went on until Maceda got wind of it. And some were proven, but, for the public to swallow her own guilt was hard, wasnt she that sweet teen girl selling us the toothpaste na kumkutitap? Pinoy pity reigned. Actually, I believe it was more of the shock of such an act from a girl who already did that scam that it was hard to believe. So Pinoys gave her a chance, kasi, bad image sa atin kung totoo. And she redeemed herself, she went top 3 in that international Beauty competition. At that time, it seemed, all the risks were worth it. She got invited to the South of France, faced international celebrities with the jet-set life. Since she got a taste of it, and she had gotten away with so much, one can only assume that nothing seemed impossible for her. She has proved time and again that rules do not apply to her.
4. Jealousy-
And then Donita made it Big. Simple, God-fearing and intelligent Donita Rose, the one Ruffa befriended sa That’s dahil naawa siya coz Donita then was a ‘probinsiyana shy type na kid ng isang American at Pinay na nagmeet sa US Base diyan sa Luzon. She’s always felt superior at mas importante sa kay Donita kahit hindi man niya sabihin, but Donita became THE IT GIRL not only sa ‘pinas kundi sa buong MTV ASIA countries. Donita even made a movie with David Hasselhoff. Donita had commercials and ads everywhere and her own Drama show in Singapore on top of her MTV Asia guestings. The worst blow was when Donita was invited to watch the races with the Queen of England. Of course friend niya yun but one only has to look back into Ruffa’s personal history of wanting to be ‘it’ and getting it all na talagang nakakadismaya ang makita na the wildest possible hippest international stardom overnight could go to Donita, who did not join any beauty contest, who wasnt that sensational, who partied with her naked.people from China, Thailand,India, Vietnam, Korea, japan, Indonesia….everyone knew who Donita was. Bigay dangal sa Pinas at mahal talaga ng tao. Perhaps their friendship was real, but then again career-jealousy can happen in any friendship, so she, Ruffa needed to do something ‘international’ too.
5. Hollywood & Bektas-
To work in the US, you need the proper papers. To work in Hollywood you need the Screen Actors Guild card, and its hard to get it. So quietly she married Rich D’aloia with the consent of her parents knowing as it is a business move (her parents knew aboout this because they were aware of her career moves and gave consent) it is okay. Marriage for Ruffa’s parents is a grey area. After all Eddie and Ms. Rama are not and even if they did before in the U.S. they divorced too at one point. The US for them became a haven for secrets and Pinas is there ‘pakitang tao’ venue, living their lives like it was staged. D’aloia for obvious reasons ‘helped’ ruffa in allowing her legitimate reason to work in the US, she was wife of an American after all. She hosted cable shows. Note: Cable shows. And when she did well, she managed to have a stint, a small one, to cover cannes for small cable networks Century Productions is selling to. Century productions is a small production company for tv, it is not like Paramount, Universal nor does it have the reach of MTV. But for the Pinoys in Pinas who do not know this, its a big deal, coz Ruffa said so. But Americans do not know of her at all, even Pinoys in America do not. Whilst Joey Mead (Pinoy Model, and Channel V vj) was spokesperson for Head and Shoulders in America, Ruffa was interviewing boxers for cable tv. Then in Cannes, she was given what could have been the biggest bonanza against selling pots and pans for the rest of her life: Mr. Bektas. The poor guy was smitten if all her stories be true. Since he was rich, very very rich, she vacationed with him in the South of France, shopped with him in Milan, lunched in London and went to European Events where the wealthy like him congregate. Compared to what she makes in her ‘hollywood career’, Mr. Bektas can over a hundred fold so it was easy for her to leave everything for ‘love’, where hardwork is not needed to beget the jetset lifestyle. She had it: she bought him a tv station, gave her extrvagant shopping sprees, houses, cars, a closet as big as an ordinary Pinoy’s House. It was publicized, from wedding to everyday happening. It was big. Her dream of affluence beyond wealth came true.
6. A Criminal Legacy
Then all that in one night came crashing down. When ruffa was a little girl, she was taught to do all to reach the top, get rich, really really rich. Her mom taught her na wag maging PG. When your in the position of just winning that race, you wouldnt think if your brakes would work coz you just wanna get there. She forgot that she was a married woman. How could she forget that easy: it was simple, for her marrying D’aloia wasnt really ‘marriage’. It was a career move. In her mind Yilmaz was her ‘husband’ and used his name, because in that manner her ‘entry’ to the jet set would be legitimized. Never mind that she’s fooling Yilmaz, or her Ninongs and Ninangs or the people that ate up every single bit of her story. Point is, at that time, she felt she had won over life. She got over the MMFF Scan, the Brunei-escort issue, even her parents are getting away with all sorts of legal wranglings in Pinas. How could her marriage with Bektas possibly go wrong? he hid the true nature of Bektas’ life, the issues that surrpund his family. Only what she wants come out. No matter that his family’s money is questionable, no matter that his is a world of seeming violence. She changed her religion without thinking overlong about it. It would be okay if this was all for ‘love’. But her psychological motivation says so otherwise. In her endless search for Fame, fortune and life without selling Pots and Pans, what could have been a most wonderful life for a girl who, like anyone deserves happiness becomes a complete and utter disaster. Nevermind that her children are now illegitimate, never mind that her actions, supported by her family plunges so many people into misery, dragging a nation into Shame, making people around the world questioning a ‘Filipina’s, personified by her,sense of dignity and self worth. But then again, all these, religion, playing with people’s hearts and minds, using others, it does not compare to the emptiness and self-loathing created if one day, the reality of her actions become clear in her mind. one can only hope that that one day will not come, and that she could continue tricking herself into a false sense of being the victim of her own life. Whose to blame? many are, but there is always one whom she cannot get away from everytime she looks at herself in the mirror. Its a sad criminal legacy to leave to your loved ones, to people who believed in you, but most of all, to your children.
said prinsesa on Jun 15, 2007 at 7:59 AM
Wala yan mga
June 15th, 2007 at 11:22 pm
Wala yan mga peeps. Even if Ruffa and Yilmaz reconcile and resume their marriage. The fact that it’s finally out that their marriage was never perfect like she claimed for so many year, and will never be perfect no matter what lessons they learned from this experience. It’s the idea that we weren’t wrong about our senses that she lied on so many thing even in the issue FTV:Turkey. Her credibility is gone way before this marriage had a falling out. And now, Ruffa is just proving that she’s not only a liar, money faced gold digger, but also she is a sell out and has no respect for her own self. She degraded women all over the world with her story of being a battered woman and yet playing along with her batterer like she’s a willing victim. Bottom line is she lost wether or not they salvage what’s left of her marriage. The point is, we all know and have proven that she’s not a human but a pig who lives her life like a pig. Just like old folks have said before, a person can dress up as beautiful, respecful, extravagant as he/she wants to be. But it’s not the outfit or make up that matters but what the person’s have in his/her heart, soul, and brain that counts. I don’t feel bad if Ruffa or Yilmaz get back together again or just turn their back on each other without any court battle. Either way, they both lost and they’ve dirtied themselves in the public eye. Nothing can erase the fact that people have proven that she lied, and that she will continue on lying. For as long as her battery is Eveready, she’ll keep on lying, lying, and lying. Bottom line is it’s better to have a simple, regular, day to day life than have all the riches and fame in the world but still be very unhappy and dis-honest with yourself. Just like you guys have posted before, Ruffa loves to name drop popular places, designer materials, etc., but does it truly mean she’s actually been there and actually knows how it’s like to walk on that place like a regular person and enjoy the scenery, and have freedom to taste the local pastries, etc. Isn’t it the same thing as Ruffa saying she has a perfect life but does she truly knows what true happiness, and what true fulfilled life really means? Just by everything she’s done, I don’t think so. She probably don’t even know what a true friend means since she even found time to get angry at her friends who was giving her some advice. For crying out loud, Ruffa can’t even make a decision on her own and can’t even face her own enemies without her mom’s help. How can she think she’ll be able to handle the pressure and aggression in Hollywood. One thing is for sure, Ruffa is NO Lea Salonga. And that says more than enough already.
said DFWUSA on Jun 15, 2007 at 8:12 AM
June 15th, 2007 at 11:08 pm
This is my last opinion!!!My parting words? Dapat mag-kaisa ang mga PILIPINO diyan na huwag panoorin ang THE BUZZ and all the movies and shows of all the Gutierrezes’. That way you can show that Filipinos can NOT and will NOT condone these kinds of people. That we, Filipinos were not brought up this way by our parents and NOT all parents are like anabelle rama who was also a BOMBA STAR way way back. Tama na ! Even PNP are willing to be exploited by anabelle and ruffa and remember, Filipinos are the ones paying ruffa’s body guards. Enough is enough. Let’s not talk about them anymore para hindi na sila ma-magnify. Show your opinion by NOT watching their shows and by NOT writing about them…
June 15th, 2007 at 5:54 pm
its very unfortunate how degrading ruffa’s lies has made towards the image of filipinas around the world. Why does ABS-CBN and many commercila ads support her??? Marrying a wealthy man for money despite being previously married to another man.
One thing i would like to raise here. If ruffa’s telling the truth that mr. Bektas already knew from the very start regarding her previous marriage to another guy in the US, shouldn’t mr. Bektas himself pressured ruffa to file for a divorce to make that marriage null and void before having a very public marriage in the philippines and in turkey??? If ruffa was afraid that her parents and the whole public might know about that, they could have done it privately so that nobody will know. The same privately undertaking when she had her marriage (nobody knew her previous marriage until lately)….
Even if i were mr. bektas or any ordinary guy, if my future wife would come to me and tell me the truth about that previous marriage, that would only prove that she really loves me and that she really trust me enough to know her past. And by doing that, she would further earn my trust and i will accept her wholeheartedly. that would give me more reason to marry her… But that didn’t happened here in the case of ruffa. Its very obvious that she kept her previous marriage to mr. bektas from the very beginning and it was one more reason enough that mr. bektas hit her.
If ruffa was physically and psychologically abused by mr. bektas, that might be out of rage coming from mr. bektas. For me, i think i believe her that she was physically abused by mr. bektas for 15 hours. for me that is already a good fortune for ruffa to recieve just 15 hours of agony… NO JOKING!!! Let us not forgot that mr. bektas is a moslem. In these moslem countries, honor killing is still practiced. Not maybe publicly, but deep in thier tradition and religion, they still devoutly treasure and uphold their family honor. Imagine how disgraceful is it for the part of mr. bektas not only to him but also to his family regarding his marriage to a woman who was previously married. WHEW!!!!! and ruffa is still expecting that filipinos would side to her part of story??? She should wake up… you know?!?!? She made a fool out of mr. bektas, enormously… she brought shame to his family, bringing down with her the image of the ordinary filipina…
And this i would also like to add… Bakit yang mga producers, commercial ads, and tv networks ei… binibigyan pa ng chance yang ruffang yan na mag-show and mag-endorse ng mga products??? ganun na ba ka-baba ang moralidad ng mga yan??? meron ngang kasabihan sa bisaya… “Basta Igat, Sikat!!!” if you wanna know the meaning of that ms. dolly anne, i know you’re a linguist that’s why i know you will be intrigued, better ask your new best friend… manay annabelle…. hehehe..
footnote: i kinda like the way you defend yourself in your column ms. dolly anne, pero sana naman don’t be boastful naman about being the daughter of inday badiday or something to that effect. Just stick to the truth… Its more than enough to convince people…
peace!!!
for any violent reactions, just e-mail me… jjfoxtrat_04@yahoo.com, i’ll be more than willing to send you some extra virus and key loggers… hahaha!!!!!!!!!!!
June 15th, 2007 at 10:43 am
laos na kc kya nagpapansin un mg-ina! pgbigyan na nten kailangan ng pera pra sa mga anak ni ruffa… dpat lng tlga xa di bgyan ng money support ni ylmaz di nman nia aswa un eh…. past time partner lng…
ang lakas manlait sa mga mhhihirap eh tga tinda lng nmn cla ng kaldero sa america b4! karma lng yan sa family hayok kc sa pera palibhasa gling sa hirap!